…Mohabbat ghum se hoti gayi

bahi hai aaj ankhe
toote hai aj kuch jaam
bass naam na aye unka hothon pe
kahi kar na de hum unhe badnaam

- Rishie

1) Now imagine this – it is that lazy Monday morning and you are getting ready for your office. You are all ready but just about to reach out to your socks only to find that you have one feet and the other is missing. And when you search your drawer you find that it was the last washed pair! Fear not – Throx is a company that sell socks not in a pair but in a three-piece pack! Now in case you loose one of them, the third one is there to your rescue.

2) Got lice? Have tried everything but no results? A guy named Day Clayton claims that he has invented a hair blower that is much more effective in removing the lice from heads as compared to medicines and shampoos. Strange enough!? If not read this -

A study of more than 150 students has already proved that it removed 80% of their lice

3) Next product is something which you will like for sure. Have ever been to McD and had a Coke Float? Want to have a better at home? Try this product. This plastic product screws up on the top of pet soft drink bottle. Put some ice-cream in it, insert the straw and squeez the bottle. The fizz will be filled out in the cup and you can enjoy the soda-ice-cream.

4) Do you fart a lot? Do you bring embrassement to yourself every time you visit a restaurant with your girl? Or every time you have that mool-ka-paraantha you tend to feel as if you have all the rights to fill the air with your smell? If yes, try this. These are Butt Fart Pads. Made by Pond Inc. these pads fit in your under wears and neutralize the fart air when it passes through it. What The Fart!!

5) Would you like to test our own urine sample and that too by putting it in your mouth!?? Yucckk!! But maybe yes, if it is yellowy sweet concoction that tastes like lemonade. Imagine you bring out a sample of urine in front of your friends and tell them that you are gonna test it right there in front of them. The very next moment you put it all in your mouth….and declare that it was sweet!!

Some people just have all the vella time in this world to think of such products!! Seriously!!

For those who do not know what am cribbing about, I am talking about the ‘Cloud Computing’, ‘The’ technology!! Technology with which people can save their data on the clouds. But please be really careful while selecting your cloud. So, that next time you want to retrieve your data from ‘that’ cloud, the cloud is not raining and there are no storms. Or else, you may loose your data and it may happen that someone else may get access to ‘your’ cloud and steal that.You think I am crazy? I knew you would. If you do not believe me, listen to what former IT (Income Tax and not Information Technology, you fools!) commissioner has to say and you better BELIEVE him!

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See! I told you guys and you never believed me!!

कड़ी धूप में जलती एक कहानी की तरह

तूफ़ानो में अटकी एक कश्ती की तरह

ये ज़िंदगी एक Emotional अत्याचार है

अपने ही सपनों से सताई हुई

अपने ही जज़बों से हराई हुई

ये ज़िंदगी एक Emotional अत्याचार है

ना जलती है…ना बुझती है

अपने ही आसुओं में भीगी है

ये ज़िंदगी एक Emotional अत्याचार है

तन्हाइयो से हारी हुई

जज़्बातों में दबाई हुई

ये ज़िंदगी एक Emotional अत्याचार है

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Tintumon : I had a grand dinner at Taj hotel yesterday.

Dundumon : How???

Tintumon : Some one gave me a Rs 100/- note yesterday . I went to Taj hotel and ordered dinner worth Rs 1,000/- and enjoyed the dinner . When the bill came , I said , I had no money.

The hotel manager called the police man and handed over me to him . I gave the Rs 100/- note to the police fellow and he set me free.

Mother: That’s very bad of your teacher. What was it that you didn’t do?

Girl: The homework.

So, have I ever fired anyone in my life? Yes and No! Yes, because I was the shoulder on which the gun was kept to ‘fire’ a kid at one of my earlier employers. No, because I had no idea about this and was never gave those orders (I never had that power to do).This is about time when globally markets were only focussing only at one direction, that is South, downwards! The stock markets were busy rounding losses for all those who believed in her. And, the governments were busy trying their countries from sinking in this economic turmoil.

So, one fine day, when we were all busy with our work. We were a team of a few experienced employees and there were two new kids on the block, working with us as trainees. Both from a very fine institute in the country.

One of these kids had to face the brunt of management – they had got him evaluated ‘tightly’. The management convincingly suggested that this would ‘help kids be better than the lot’. So, our team lead had to do a ‘tight evaluation’ and similar tight evaluations were got done by other leaders, with whom he worked in next couple of months. And then, finally, the evaluations got a bit tighter for him to breathe the office air any more. He was fired!

The moment I got to know about this, I was so angry on the management. I immediately stood up and noticed that it was already 9:00 and I was almost late to office. Shittt!! I threw away the sheet and ran as fast as I could to the bathroom. After all, the economy was down and how could I let myself go down with it!?

[As you would have already made out, this whole incident was just a story and nothing else. Actually was getting bored.]